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[whitespace] Tara

Dream Angel

Dear Tara,
I often have the unusual experience of leaving my earth-body and going on long journeys in the astral plane. I'll see a long silver thread or cord connecting my soul to my corporal form, and then, unconcernedly, I'll go off on my exciting ethereal adventures. The only drawback is, I seem to most frequently have these out-of-body experiences while having sex with my wife or while driving the car. Is this a cause for concern?
Signed, Windwalker

Dear Wind,
You have a great gift that should be put to use for the good of humanity. The ability to astrally project one's soul has been known about for millennia; shamans past and present have used this power to go on spirit-quests, fighting the spirits of diseases or other evils that afflicted their communities.

A related phenomenon is bilocation, in which a person physically appears at two or more places at the same time. There was an episode of The X-Files once where this cute little kid was being chased by the devil, and the wily 10-year-old bilocated and jumped out of his Mom's car, while also staying in the car at the same time. You know, kids are often a lot smarter than we give them credit for, and there's a great deal we could probably learn from them if we just opened up our hearts.

Anyway, I don't know how good you are at battling the demonic essences of ailments like AIDS or cancer, but I bet you could still do the world a lot of good turns while you're up there floating around. For instance, you might be the first to see a little kitty stuck in a tree and perhaps go spiritually "nudge" a friendly fireman to go and rescue the little critter. Or you might be drifting around inside a mall and see a woman about to buy a dress that would really just not look right on her. How about causing a poltergeist-like distraction in another part of the store until the lady comes to her senses, or at least decides to put off her purchase for another day? Sure, she may come back in the following week and buy that darn frumpy frock, but hey, you're not God. You did what you could, right?

You know, I REALLY love that show Touched by an Angel and have often thought how much fun it would be to glide around the world doing good for others. That show Dawson's Creek is pretty good too, but I don't like it when it gets all preachy. If I could be anyone on TV, though, I guess I would pick Frasier's brother on Frasier. Isn't that weird? I wonder what that says about me. You know, my new doctor said it would be about four weeks before I really started feeling the effects of the lithium, but it's day 12 and I already feel A LOT better. Oh look, Windwalker, I see you! I'm waving at you, can you see me?
Signed, Tara

Can't get enough of Miss T? Well, check out her "Most Spiritual Show Ever," where you'll find new video adventures each week, and your video horoscope!

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From the June 21, 1999 issue of the Metropolitan.

Copyright © Metro Publishing Inc.